Article:Rebutting dumb Yankees fans, Inciting dumb Yankees fans

There is, of course, a mind-bending level of stupidity entailed when jeering your home team’s best player. The reasons are often varied, and always retarded. Maybe you’re angry he makes more money than you, even though you could never do his job, not in a million years, which is why, of course, he makes more money than you. Maybe a jilted sportswriter told you not to like him, and you followed like a trained seal, clapping for a biscuit, [Do seals eat biscuits?] overwhelmed by the titanic brainpower of literary heavyweights like Woody Paige. Maybe he had a rough playoff series and made you cry, emotionally scarring you for two whole days. Whatever… the reasons are secondary, anyway.

This idiotic process is validated by your local, lecherous media, which feeds off the negative energy, perpetuating an illogical pattern of behavior.

Dumb Yankee fans [there are smart ones, believe me] possess a very narrow scope of logic. It’s strictly an A+B=C scenario. They haven’t won a title with Alex Rodriguez. Therefore, he stinks. The math is actually that simple, at least in the mind of a typical D.Y.F.

I have no idea if other franchises have been victimized. Phillies fans hated Bobby Abreu for some bizarre reason. I’m not sure if Red Sox fans have ever been this irrational, maybe one can remind me. All I know is, the negative energy flowing from the upper deck at tonight’s game was absolutely palatable, and powerful.

Was I pissed when A-Rod meekly tapped into a double play at nefarious hands of Justin Masterson? Yes. Am I angry that my favorite team’s baseball season is circling the drain largely because of their mysterious inability to get hits with runners in scoring position, and that Alex Rodriguez has been very much part of the problem? Yes, infuriated actually.

But incensed enough to boo the guy like he’s Bobby Bonilla circa 1992? It makes no sense. None.

I have to admit, I was pretty angry after the game tonight. There was a lesson here that transcended baseball. I felt I’d reached an epiphany regarding human nature, especially in the area of scapegoat logic. After all, Jason Giambi deserves an equal measure of scathing treatment from the D.Y.F. contingent. Inept as Rodriguez with runners in scoring and without a title to his name, Jason gets a pass. All the hate is reserved for A-Rod. It has to be.

This is probably the lowest I’ve ever felt as a Yankee fan. Just a hideous, angry atmosphere in which to watch a ballgame…

In my distress, I’ve compiled a listed rebuttal for D.Y.F. Nation to consider before the next time they boo Alex Rodriguez as he attempts to field a ground ball.


 * 1) Without Alex Rodriguez performing spectacularly in the REGULAR SEASON back in 2005 and 2007, two Yankee editions featuring shaky starting pitching would have missed the POST-SEASON. Contrary to what you may believe, the Yankees are not awarded an invitation to October by Bud Selig after Spring Training. The regular season does matter. Alex Rodriguez’s performance in the regular season does matter. The playoff streak would have ended years ago without him.
 * 2) Alex Rodriguez changed positions so he could play for the New York Yankees. He severed ties with his long time agent this past winter so he could remain a member of the New York Yankees. He had other options. He could have played short again somewhere. Why do you hate him so much?
 * 3) Alex Rodriguez is playing for the Yankees the rest of his career. Isn’t booing him counterproductive? Don’t you want to see him succeed?
 * 4) Alex Rodriguez is NOT the reason the New York Yankees haven’t won a World Series title since 2001. Do you actually believe he is? Wait a second… do you actually believe this team would be better off with a WORSE player at third base? Do you think the 2005 Yankees, who prominently featured Carl Pavano, Kevin Brown, and Jaret Wright in a rotation sponsored by Tommy John, would have made the playoffs with Scott Brosius’ big stick at third? You think the ’04 Yankees, who pretty much had a two-man bullpen and a sketchy rotation for much of the season would have been a better team with Aaron Boone manning the hot corner? Do you think Alex Rodriguez is a negative karmic force which causes otherwise good teams to lose? Man… oh… man… Go right ahead… rebut with a misguided argument about the 2001 Mariners or 2004 Rangers being better without Alex Rodriguez. Before 2001, the Mariners signed Bret Boone and some guy named Suzuki, both had marvelous seasons that nobody saw coming. Mike Cameron and Ichiro may have been the best outfield combo, in terms of fielding, that the game has EVER SEEN. Think about it like this: Without Boone and Suzuki, the two MAIN COGS in the ’01 Mariners, the 2000 Mariners, with Rodriguez in their stead, made it to the playoffs and the ALCS. Bret Boone would fade with time. Ichiro, for all his wonderful ability, simply can’t elevate a mediocre team to another level. Take last year’s Mariners. Would they have been better with Suzuki or Rodriguez as their superstar? As for the ’04 Rangers, they enjoyed a convergence of fluke seasons. Ron Mahay and Brian Shouse had career years, Francisco Cordero was at his absolute peak, and Ryan Drese never came close to winning fourteen games again. They were lucky, not better without Alex Rodriguez. Bringing back largely the same cast of characters in preceding seasons, the team regressed, costing Buck Showalter his job. Teams are NOT BETTER without Alex Rodriguez. Please understand this. Please.
 * 5) Do you really care about Alex Rodriguez’s personal life? Babe Ruth passed out at Brothels and tried throwing his manager off a speeding train, and he’s a baseball legend. Go ahead, hate Alex as a person, it may or may not be justified. But it should have no bearing as you view him as a fan of the Yankees. None. Take this tidbit from Oscar Wilde: Separate the artist from his art.
 * 6) You really look ridiculous. I mean, flat out dumb. Remember booing Mariano Rivera because he blew a game in April? [BUT IT WAS AGAINST TEH BOSTON!!1111] Yeah… this stuff is building up. Somebody call the karma police.

Damn you D.Y.F.’S. There are plenty of sane, reasonable Yankees fans out there. We’re tired of you representing the majority.