Article:Report: Duncan Not In Control Of His Actions; Has Voldemort Returned?

A report has surfaced that New York Yankee Shelly Duncan was not in control of his actions when he slid spikes high into Akinori Iwamura and incited a spring training fracas.

Reporter Cho Chang of the Daily Prophet has reported on her blog that Duncan was under an Imperius Curse, but she did not specify as to who was controlling him at the time of the incident.

Yankee officials declined to comment specifically, saying only that "that Imperius Curse doesn't exist. It's a creation of the Ministry to scare children at bedtime."

The Ministry of Magic has remained mum, issuing a short statement indicating that a full investigation is ongoing and that they  have already questioned a number of suspects.

One fan who attended the game said "The muggles present mistook the Dark Mark for a fireworks display. Mark my words, the Dark Lord will return."

More than a few bloggers referred to this quote and have speculated that Yankee manager Joe Girardi is also under the curse. The speculation is rampant that Hank Steinbrenner is the one who cast the spell. Or spells.

Steinbrenner dismissed these rumors as "poppycock" and stated "I have but one goal - to restore order. And I'll use whatever charms and magic tricks I have in my arsenal to return the Yankees to greatness. This Imperius stuff is pure nonsense."