Article:The New Globetrotters

There was a time in basketball when being a GLOBETROTTER meant traveling from Harlem to Washington D.C to embarrass a team of actors called The Washington Generals. That wasn’t trotting the globe as much as taking a short bus ride, but the world has gotten bigger for basketball, and the NATIONAL BASKETBALL ASSOCIATION is now more of an INTERNATIONAL BASKETBALL ASSOCIATION. The league has found that its product is played everywhere, and talented players are available outside of North Carolina. Some of my friends in the BLOGOSPHERE aren’t as keen to the idea of importing tall, skinny men as the NBA is. Too often I read the opinion that the NBA has become infatuated with obscure foreign players at the expense of our own homegrown talent. That, I say, is just not true. The NBA game is made for (and by) American basketball players, but it must continue to allow talented international players to come and help sell the product. Some of the names on the jerseys may be more difficult to pronounce, but in the end, basketball is the winner of this globalization. Nobody is saying that Major League Baseball should reject players from the Dominican Republic, and neither should the NBA ignore players from Slovenia. The game is available to the best talent in the world now, and that is the way it will remain. Perhaps the problem is that the cynics are just ignorant to the background of these imports. So, in an effort to bring peace and tolerance to the world of professional basketball, I have prepared a list of foreign-born NBA players that did not play high school or college basketball in the United States. I hope that this will educate the masses and help folks understand the new Globetrotters. ARGENTINA PLAYERS: CARLOS DELFINO, Toronto Raptors MANU GINOBILI, San Antonio Spurs ANDRES NOCIONI, Chicago Bulls FABRICIO OBERTO, San Antonio Spurs Luis Scola, Houston Rockets FACTS: POPULATION: 38,740,807 LOCATION: Southern South America GOVERNMENT: Republic GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: Ginobili Bobble-head Dolls BRAZIL  PLAYERS: LEANDRO BARBOSA, Phoenix Suns NENE, Denver Nuggets ANDERSON VAREJAO, Cleveland Cavaliers FACTS: POPULATION: 182,032,604 LOCATION: Eastern South America GOVERNMENT:: Federative republic GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: Supermodels CHINA  PLAYERS: YAO MING, Houston Rockets YI JIANLIAN, Milwaukee Bucks FACTS: POPULATION: 1,286,975,468 LOCATION: Eastern Asia GOVERNMENT: Communist state GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: Chicken Chow Mein CONGO  PLAYERS: DJ MBENGA, Los Angeles Lakers FACTS: POPULATION: 3,039,126 LOCATION: Western Africa GOVERNMENT: Republic GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: Michael Crichton books CROATIA  PLAYERS: GORDAN GIRICEK, Phoenix Suns MARIO KASUN, Orlando Magic FACTS: POPULATION: 4,422,248 LOCATION: Southeastern Europe GOVERNMENT: Presidential/parliamentary democracy GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: Used Yugos FRANCE  PLAYERS: BORIS DIAW, Phoenix Suns TONY PARKER, San Antonio Spurs JOHAN PETRO, Seattle Supersonics MICKAEL PIETRUS, Golden State Warriors IAN MAHINMI, San Antonio Spurs FACTS: POPULATION: 60,180,529 LOCATION: Western Europe GOVERNMENT: Republic GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: Berets, Cheese, Smelly People GEORGIA, REPUBLIC OF  PLAYERS: ZAZA PACHULIA, Atlanta Hawks FACTS: POPULATION: 5,726,000 LOCATION: Southwestern Asia GOVERNMENT: Multiparty Republic GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: Difficult to pronounce names GERMANY  PLAYERS: DIRK NOWITZKI, Dallas Mavericks FACTS: POPULATION: 82,398,326 LOCATION: Central Europe GOVERNMENT: Federal republic GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: Cars for Rich Douchebags ITALY  PLAYERS: ANDREA BARGNANI, Toronto Raptors MARCO BELINELLI, Golden State Warriors FACTS: POPULATION: 58,147,733 LOCATION: Southern Europe GOVERNMENT: Bicameral Parliament GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: Offers You Can’t Refuse LATVIA  PLAYERS: ANDRIS BIEDRINS, Golden State Warriors FACTS: POPULATION: 2,348,784 LOCATION: Eastern Europe, GOVERNMENT: Parliamentary democracy GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: T-shirts that say - “We’re not Russians!” LITHUANIA  PLAYERS: MARTYNAS ANDRIUSKEVICIUS, Cleveland Cavaliers ZYDRUNAS ILGAUSKAS, Cleveland Cavaliers FACTS: POPULATION: 3,592,561 LOCATION: Eastern Europe GOVERNMENT: Parliamentary Democracy GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: Nike “Air Ilgauskas” Sneakers POLAND  PLAYERS: MARCIN GORTAT, Orlando Magic FACTS: POPULATION: 38,622,660 LOCATION: Central Europe GOVERNMENT: Republic GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: Self-deprecating Jokes RUSSIA  PLAYERS: ANDREI KIRILENKO, Utah Jazz YAROSLAV KOROLEV, LA Clippers FACTS: POPULATION: 144,526,278 LOCATION: Northern Asia GOVERNMENT: Federation GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: James Bond Enemies SENEGAL

PLAYERS: CHEIKH SAMB, Detroit Pistons MOUHAMED SENE, Seattle Supersonics FACTS: POPULATION: 12,521,851 LOCATION: Western Africa GOVERNMENT: Republic GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: French-speaking Black Dudes not married to Eva Longoria SERBIA & MONTENEGRO

PLAYERS: MARKO JARIC, Minnesota Timberwolves NENAD KRSTIC, New Jersey Nets DARKO MILICIC, Memphis Grizzlies ALEKSANDAR PAVLOVIC, Cleveland Cavaliers KOSTA PEROVIC, Golden State Warriors VLADIMIR RADMANOVIC, Seattle Supersonics PEJA STOJAKOVIC, New Orleans Hornets FACTS: POPULATION: 10,655,774 LOCATION: Southeastern Europe GOVERNMENT: Republic GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: Facial hair SLOVENIA PLAYERS: PRIMOZ BREZEC, Toronto Raptors BOSTJAN NACHBAR, New Jersey Nets RASHO NESTEROVIC, Toronto Raptors BENO UDRIH, Sacramento Kings SASHA VUJACIC, Los Angeles Lakers FACTS: POPULATION: 1,935,677 LOCATION: Central Europe GOVERNMENT: Parliamentary Democratic Republic GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: T-shirts that say – “If this Parliamentary Democratic Republic is Rockin’, don’t come Knockin’” SOUTH KOREA

PLAYERS: HA SEUNG-JIN, Portland Trailblazers FACTS: POPULATION: 48,289,037 LOCATION: Eastern Asia GOVERNMENT: Republic GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: Fuel for Margaret Cho jokes SPAIN

PLAYERS: JOSE CALDERON, Toronto Raptors PAU GASOL, Los Angeles Lakers Juan Carlos Navarro, Memphis Grizzlies Sergio Rodriguez, Portland Trailblazers Jorge Garbajosa, Toronto Raptors FACTS: POPULATION: 40,217,413 LOCATION: Southwestern Europe GOVERNMENT: Parliamentary monarchy GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: Hating America SWITZERLAND

PLAYERS: Thabo Sefolosha, Chicago Bulls FACTS: POPULATION: 7,554,661 LOCATION: Western Europe GOVERNMENT: Federal Republic GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: The Best Knives in the World TURKEY

PLAYERS: ERSAN ILYASOVA, Milwaukee Bucks MEHMET OKUR, Utah Jazz HEDO TURKOGLU, Orlando Magic FACTS: POPULATION: 68,109,469 LOCATION: southeastern Europe and southwestern Asia GOVERNMENT: Republican parliamentary democracy GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: Strangely, it’s not turkeys

UKRAINE

PLAYERS: Kyrylo Fesenko, Utah Jazz Oleksiy Pecherov, Washington Wizards FACTS: POPULATION: 48,055,439 LOCATION: Eastern Europe GOVERNMENT: Republic GROSS NATIONAL PRODUCT: Frozen nipples