Article:TEIXEIRA. Never happening.

An oddity of the mother tongue is that 'slim chance', 'fat chance', and 'no chance' have the same meaning. And linguistics says Mark Teixeira ain't coming to Boston.

We'll never get him. It breaks the rule!

"I before E except after C, or when sounded like 'A' as in neighbor and way."

Or the exceptions:"neither foreign financier seized either species of weird leisure." Or T-EI-x-EI-ra. Just saying.